December Remembers

December is meant to be a festive month but it has always seemed a little sad to me. When I was growing up in Delhi it was a time of cold weather, sunless days, and sometimes bitter rain. It was a time of year that invited poignant reflections. Now I live in Singapore and the sun is never gone for long. But I can still sense a melancholy trace underneath the holiday cheer.

I was reminded of this earlier today at the football pitch (of all places!). Going for my weekly game I was struck by how few people there were at the ground. It's the same in the office. People are going away, and it's starting to feel emptier. Soon it will feel empty.

It's been a strange year at the office. So many people have resigned and gone away. Too many of them were people I liked. I must admit I am surprised to realize how much I've been affected by their departures. Very few were people I would call friends; I don't really have that many close friends. But each person who left, left behind a small empty space that I cannot help but notice if I just take the time to look.

The calendar counts down to the end of the year and invites us to remember endings, to count partings, to notice what is no longer there and consider what else may soon be gone.

December still feels sad to me.