The New Adventures Of The Boiling Kettle

Reality TV originated in 1948, with Candid Camera. That was an inventive show, even featuring Woody Allen as writer and performer in the 1960s. Since then the genre has been on a long, slow downhill slope, gathering speed as it goes along. It may have finally crashed into the rock bottom.

We are now being offered the chance to watch Adrenaline Rush, featuring Jack Osbourne. Jack who, you ask? He's the son of Ozzy Osbourne, the legendary lunatic lead singer of Black Sabbath. He who infamously bit off a dove's head. And then, in an act that even by his standards reeked of bad taste, he begat Jack.

Jack is not famous for anything. Unlike Paris Hilton, he is not even famous for being famous. In fact he's really not famous at all; he's just somewhat-known in a rather listless sort of way. His chief distinguishing characteristic used to be that he was grossly fat. Unfortunately his TV show is about him losing that excess weight. So this latest triumph of reality programming gives us the glorious opportunity to watch a relative unknown sink steadily into completely undistinguished obscurity.

How about I just watch paint dry instead?